*There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be discovered. Finding them all means living forever.*Lime is a green-tasting rock.
*Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil.
*Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.
*To most people solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up.
*In looking at a drop of water under a microscope, we find there are twice as many H's as O's.
*Clouds are high flying fogs.
*Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dogs tongue will kill the strongest man.
*A blizzard is when it snows sideways.
*Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound.
*It is so hot in some places that the people there have to live in other places.
*Wind is like the air, only pushier.
*Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
*Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull.
*H20 is hot water, and CO2 is cold water."
*Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes, and caterpillars.
*The body consists of three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e,i, o and u.
*Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.
*For drowning: climb on top of the person and move up and down to make Artificial Perspiration.
*For Fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the hand instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor."
*The tides are a fight between the Earth and Moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
*Germinate: To become a naturalized German.
*To prevent contraception: wear a condominium.
