John Cleese & Tina Turner :~)

Dateline:~)

A Bosnian couple are getting divorced after finding out they had been secretly chatting each other up online under fake names.
Sana Klaric, 27, and husband Adnan, 32, from Zenica, poured out their hearts to each other over their marriage troubles, and both felt they had found their real soul mate.
The couple met on an online chat forum while he was at work and she in an internet cafe, and started chatting under the names Sweetie and Prince of Joy.
They eventually decided to meet up - but there was no happy ending when they realised what had happened.
Now they are both filing for divorce - with each accusing the other of being unfaithful.
Sana said: "I thought I had found the love of my life. The way this Prince of Joy spoke to me, the things he wrote, the tenderness in every expression was something I had never had in my marriage.
"It was amazing, we seemed to be stuck in the same kind of miserable marriages - and how right that turned out to be.
"We arranged to meet outside a shop and both of us would be carrying a single rose so we would know the other.
"When I saw my husband there with the rose and it dawned on me what had happened I was shattered. I felt so betrayed. I was so angry."
Adnan said: "I was so happy to have found a woman who finally understood me. Then it turned out that I hadn't found anyone new at all.
"To be honest I still find it hard to believe that the person, Sweetie, who wrote such wonderful things to me on the internet, is actually the same woman I married and who has not said a nice word to me for years."

Jim Morrison Quotes

*Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.
*Each generation wants new symbols, new people, new names. They want to divorce themselves from their predecessors.
*Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
*Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself-and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to-letting a person be what he really is.
*I am interested in anything about revolt, disorder, chaos-especially activity that seems to have no meaning. It seems to me to be the road toward freedom... Rather than starting inside, I start outside and reach the mental through the physical.
*I believe in a long, prolonged derangement of the senses to attain the unknown. Our pale reasoning hides the infinite from us.
*I like people who shake other people up and make them feel uncomfortable.
*I see myself as an intelligent, sensitive human, with the soul of a clown which forces me to blow it at the most important moments.
*Listen, real poetry doesn't say anything; it just ticks off the possibilities. Opens all doors. You can walk through anyone that suits you.
*Music inflames temperament.
*Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts.
*The most loving parents and relatives commit murder with smiles on their faces. They force us to destroy the person we really are: a subtle kind of murder.
*Violence isn't always evil. What's evil is the infatuation with violence.
*When you make your peace with authority, you become authority.
*Whoever controls the media, controls the mind.

XYu - Ibrica

Why God Made Moms

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:
Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them .
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Dye it. You know her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head

Ten Years After

Most Intriguing Conspiracy Theories to Date

Besides the well known theories like - the USA destroyed the World Trade Center (read here), and The HIV virus was created to eradicate homosexuals (read here), the boldest are the following:

Underground Reich
David Emory, a TV and radio shows' author claims that the world is ruled by the Underground Reich. To clarify, the entire infrastructure that helped Hitler gain power, for instance the heavy industry, banking, and the military, has survived World War II. Many war criminals from that period have successfully evaded trial and resumed their lives in western countries, where they were able to survive because of the fear of communism. They infiltrated governments, armies, companies, and intelligence agencies and they control the world from those positions. The Underground Reaich thus represents an ominous, merciless global capitalism.
Diabetes is curable
Diabetes is really curable, but it is in the interest of the pharmaceutical industry to only remove the symptoms. It has been curable for about 40 years, but big companies realized that symptoms of diabetes have high commercial value so they are launching products on the market that only remove them, while the illness remains. Food companies, which produce food made of refined flour and sugar that causes blood sugar to suddenly rise and drop, are also involved in the conspiracy.
Project Disclosure

is a non-profit research organization that deals with the understanding of the UFO phenomenon. For years, they have asked for a U.S. Congress hearing on extraterrestrial presence on Earth and for a law to be passed that would ban positioning weapons in the Earth orbit. They think that our planet has been visited by aliens for centuries and the contact has been most intense since 1947. They think that, from time to time, extraterrestrial ships would land and sometimes be incapacitated or seized, especially by teams operating in the U.S. Extraterrestrial life forms have been studied for more than 50 years. A very narrow circle of people knows about this and the organization thinks that a serious public debate should be started about the existence of extraterrestrial intelligence and their visits to our planet.

Novak Djokovic you've never seen before

Apart from being an excellent tennis player, Novak Djokovic is well-known as a great entertainer and impersonator of other famous tennis players.


He is currently behind Federer and Nadal in the ATP rankings, but if karaoke contests counted, the situation would be a whole lot different.

Steely Dan

Forever Cool

Dean Martin has had the market cornered on charisma, easygoing charm, playful wit, and gracious humility, all of which combine to make him infinitely cool. To honor Martin's broad appeal and countless contributions to modern entertainment via his legendary music, stage, film and television career, world's top artists have recorded new collaborative tracks with him for a new album titled Dean Martin: Forever Cool. Joss Stone, Kevin Spacey, saxophonist Dave Koz, Grammy winner Shelby Lynne, trumpeter Chris Botti, Robbie Williams, "American Idol" finalist Paris Bennett, country singer Martina McBride, Charles Aznavour, Italian chart-topper Tiziano Ferro and others.
Track Listing:
1. Who's Got The Action (Big Bad Voodoo Daddy)
2. Ain't That A Kick In The Head (Kevin Spacey)
3. I've Grown Accustomed To Her Face (Chris Botti)
4. Baby-O (Paris Bennett)
5. Who Was That Lady? (The Capitol Studios Orchestra)
6. Please Don't Talk About Me When I'm Gone (Robbie Williams)
7. I Can't Believe That You're In Love With Me (Joss Stone)
8. Just In Time (Dave Koz)
9. Baby, It's Cold Outside (Martina McBride)
10. King Of The Road (Kevin Spacey)
11. You're Nobody 'Til Somebody Loves You (Big Bad Voodoo Daddy & Shelby Lynne)
12. Arrivederci Roma (Tiziano Ferro)
13. Everybody Loves Somebody (Charles Aznavour)
14. Brahm's Lullaby A Capella (Dean Martin)

Aleister Crowley surfaces again

This occultist, once dubbed the most evil man in Britain who died in 1947 , had inspired Jimmy Page, who is a big collector of Crowley's writings and even bought his Scottish estate. Black Sabbath eulogized him in the song Mr. Crowley. His face is one of the many on the cover of the Beatles' Sergeant Pepper album (top row second from left, next to Mae West.). He appeared at No. 74 in a poll of the 100 greatest Britons, just ahead of Robert the Bruce and Bob Geldof. And now Iron Maiden's frontman Bruce Dickinson wrote a screenplay and is making supernatural horror movie The Chemical Wedding inspired by Aleister Crowley.
Check out some of his work here.

Ivan Mestrovic

Chris Rea

George Orwell spied on ...

...by MI-5! Orwell first came to the attention of the intelligence community when MI-6 (Britain's foreign intelligence service) noted that he apparently offered to work as the Paris correspondent for the Workers Life publication. They monitored this socialist writer for more than two decades, labeling him a communist. "This man has advanced communist views and several of his Indian friends say that they have often seen him at communist meetings. He dresses in a bohemian fashion both at his office and in his leisure hours." (?!) In 1930s Orwell fought against Franco in the Spanish civil war and was talked about as someone who "has been a bit of an anarchist in his day and in touch with extremist elements." The MI-5 officer questioned what that meant. It emerged that Orwell - referred to in the documents by his real name Eric Blair - was thought to be an "unorthodox communist" who did not agree fully with Communist Party views...

1984

Animal Farm

In the middle of the Caribbean - Lost Paradise

Haiti is the world's first black republic. It was a beacon for blacks, but it has never lived up to its promises. It is the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere. It obtained independence from France over two centuries ago, but today it's often mentioned as a classic example of a failed state, a country which is unable to control its territory and is unable to provide its people with the most basic services, such as water, electricity, education, health care and justice.
Port-au-Prince has grown exponentially from one million to three million in the past two decades. Most of the people who arrived there have little or no education: 70% of Haitians are illiterate. They wound up in filthy, overcrowded slums with almost no job opportunities. Crime surged. And then the United States started deporting American criminals of Haitian origin back to their country. They began forming gangs, which now terrorise the slums and much of the rest of the capital.
No one is safe in the city. Blacks, whites, adults, elderly people and even children leave their homes at their own peril: up to 30 people a day are kidnapped. Their relatives or friends have to pay thousands of dollars to secure their release.
Until recently capital submerged in garbage. But then came the Clean Streets Project. It is run by an international aid organisation, the Pan American Development Foundation. "There seems to be a correlation between clean streets and the perception of good governance. Every day people head out onto the streets of Port-au-Prince, wearing bright yellow T-shirts with the slogan - Respect yourself. Clean your country."
Everyone hopes these small steps will inspire bigger that will better the life in this beautiful country.

Stratus

Brain Cramps

*Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever - Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

*I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body, - Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

*Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,-Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC

*That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it, -A congressional candidate in Texas .
*Half this game is ninety percent mental. -Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

*I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix .-Dan Quayle

*We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need ?-Lee Iacocca

*The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.-Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.

*We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.-Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor.

*Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.-Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina

*If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record.-Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

Did I read that right?

Did I read that sign right?
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park: (I sure hope so)
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)

Tír Na Nóg

Heart Of SA

This year's Sarajevo Film Festival had shown 157 films, and cevapi and cheep cabs were enjoyed by the stars such as Jeremy Irons (president of the Competition Features Jury), Michael Moore ('Sicko'), Juliette Binoche ('Breaking and Entering', 'Flight of the Red Balloon'), Steve Buscemi ('Delirious, 'Interview')...

US were presented by 18 movies, UK 1, Sweden 2, Spain 3, Norway 3, Ireland 3, Germany 18, France 24, Denmark 4... Canada 0.

The reputation of the Festival is growing exponentially. Plan your next visit to ex-Yu in mid-August so you can enjoy it, too!